mmkay

so I'm done feeling sorry for myself. Yes, I may be sick. Yes, I may have gone through an entire box of Kleenex. Yes, I may becoming addicted to my Vicks Sinex Nasal Spray. However, I will never get better if I stay in my germ infected room for the next 48 hours.

Since I've been laying in bed for the past 6 hours, I've gone through two movies- Without a Paddle and Coach Carter, about 14 blogs, about an hour reading the New York Times, and as previously stated, an entire box of Kleenex. So here's what I have learned:
1. Hairy legs are gross. Thanks for reminding me of that Without a Paddle.
2. People are crazy about basketball. And not in a good way either. Why would a school board vote to end a basketball lockout, even though half of the athletes are failing? Shouldn't they be siding with the coach? Pssh, people are dumb.
3. I could never play on a basketball team. Not because of my lack of skill, physical fitness, or HOPS (as my middle schoolers like to say), but it's really super stressful. For example, whenever the team was down I started freaking out, "Are they gonna make the shot? What if they lose?!?" Even though it is JUST A MOVIE and I've seen it a million times therefore I know what the outcome is, I still start stressing.
4. My ZEKE is here! I'll finish this list later!

i'm dying.

I have post nasal drip and I feel like death. I can't breathe, I can't sleep and my life is basically sucking big time right now. You want to know how I'm going to spend my Saturday? Alternately laying in bed feeling sorry for myself and cleaning my room because it's a straight up Paula Abdul disaster. Wow, I have the best life ever.

it's been an eventful 2009

with two Chrysalis', one heartbreak, 16 credits, and 360487324603270 hours worked so far. I just wanted to check in, let y'all know I'm not dead or anything. Although, everyday when I go to work I wonder how many people had to commit suicide via the Freemont Bridge before they put up those suicide hotline signs...

So it's super late and I have a test tomorrow morning- I'm going to bed. BUT, I'll totally update you all on my life tomorrow (after my test of course).

I MESSED UP.

big time. The reason this guy won't text me back? Because I have been texting the WRONG NUMBER for the past two weeks. And why didn't the owner of this wrong number correct me? Because it is out of service. Which is a good thing because then they would not be all freaked out by some of the messages I sent.

Now I have to go tell him that it is all my fault and hope that it is not too late, even though I'm afraid my grace period is definitely up.

I just wish I would have:
1. Realized it earlier.
2. Not jumped to conclusions.
3. Not gotten drunk and proceeded to express those conclusions with him.
4. Not been such a douchebox.

Really. It is my fault and I'm going to have to take the fall. The question is, how far will I drop?

i hate

when people do not text me back. If you ever want to piss me off, just don't text me back. Seriously, I will begin to hate you. So this was my first week back to school. It went okay, I generally like my classes and have at least one friend in each class. Plus I get out early 3 out of the 5 days so that's nice.

Last night I went over to Lo's house and definitely got trashed, because to be honest, aside from school and work, my life sucked. I constantly feel like I'm out of money, bitch is apparently my default setting, and I am semi-fighting with this guy. Wanna know why we're fighting? Because he didn't text me back. Honestly.

It really is all of my fault though because I don't know what I want from him and I always assume the worst. I am so melodramatic sometimes.

It's been awhile

But it's not like anyone reads this anyway. In the past few months I finished up Fall quarter at Clark, nearly committed suicide over a family holiday, upped the ante on my "BAD GIRL" status, and learned how to play Halo. Yeah, exciting huh?

School starts on Monday and I feel horribly unprepared. I had a lot of goals for this break and I don't think I achieved a single one. I'm going to go start my Ideals talk, which was due last Saturday, by the way. Maybe if I finish that I can mark something off of my list.